Many women, myself included, have had to rely on primarily masculine energy to make money. Assertiveness, independence, strength, and grit have been the skills required in order to achieve financial success for a long time. So we adapted to our environment and learned these skills. We became independent, assertive, and strong enough to push ourselves far beyond our comfort zones and maintainable capacities. However, I am here to burst your ambitious bubble and tell you that hustle can only get you so far, and that at some point, if you genuinely want to create wealth, you will have to learn how to work with your feminine energy.
I built my company part time while also attending my final years of nursing school. As soon as I graduated and got my first job as an RN, my business started growing exponentially. I stretched myself so thin that it took me less than two months to quit my job and focus fully on growing my company. Four months after that, I burned myself out completely, but in that amount of time my company generated $1.2M in sales.
Getting there was done primarily in masculine energy. I was creating daily free content, recording hundreds of trainings, writing books, creating sales pages, launching offers, and running masterminds. At some point, my nervous system could no longer keep up with the amount of stress and pressure I was putting on myself emotionally, mentally, or physically. I knew that if I wanted to grow my income any more, I needed to do something other than just force myself to work harder.
In order to even begin working with feminine energy, I had to calm the eff down. This meant building habits, routines and structures to help me relax and keep me grounded. In order to calm down, I needed space, and in order to create space, I had to surrender some of my responsibilities and let other people support me.
Working towards existing in a constant state of abundance has meant a lot of acceptance and reframing. The thing about manifestation is that we are co-creating this reality with everyone else. The co-creative process is simple but requires radical honesty with yourself and others, and most people aren’t willing to do that. Taking a good look at and coming to terms with where you are and what you are working with is the first step towards creating a life of abundance. When I accepted that I am not alone in this creative process and I don’t have to do it all on my own, things became a lot easier.
I am an extremely stubborn woman with a streak of fierce independence. Letting people take over anything in my business was one of the most challenging things I had to do. I had to deepen my trust in myself, the people around me, and the Universe. The thing about surrendering is that you really only have to surrender when things are uncertain. It’s easy to say that you will surrender when things feel like they are flowing effortlessly, but not nearly as easy when you are uncertain of what will happen next. Through hiring a team, I surrendered some of the effort and gave myself the space to work on myself and lay the foundation for the next evolution of my company.
When I first started my company, I was running on coffee and willpower. My nervous system was in a high alert state, my stress levels were high, and I was exhausted. After I quit my job and hired a team, I had space for the first time ever to slow down. I had no excuses but to look at how I was managing my energy. First, I needed to change how I supported my physical body. I no longer desired to be in a high-stress experience, so I made some lifestyle changes. I changed the way I was working out from high intensity weight lifting to yoga and biking. I switched out coffee for herbal tea, and I stopped setting an alarm so I could wake up naturally.
Next, I focused on optimizing my energy. I used my human design chart as a blueprint for this, and while I worked with the entire chart there are a few specific details that I can point out for you. Being a manifesting generator, it is important for me to have satisfaction and peace in my daily experience. I added to my satisfaction by switching from reading for educational purposes to reading for fun. I added in peace primarily through creating a peaceful environment but I also intentionally found pockets of peace throughout the day.
Being defined emotionally means that I have a fixed way of emotionally processing things. I have supported this by creating daily practices to check in and sit with whatever it is that I am feeling. Usually following my yoga practice or a walk, I spend about 15 minutes being emotionally available to myself. I get clear on what I am feeling, and I let myself feel through it. In only 15 minutes of focused emoting, I can usually feel through and process 4-5 different feelings.
When you have a defined emotional center, it means that you are an emotional authority. Emotional clarity is a requirement for me to make decisions. Spending time to feel through and then journal about what I am feeling helps me make decisions quicker and is building my emotional intelligence. This routine will allow me to feel grounded and stable no matter what big emotions I am processing. Especially being an entrepreneur, there are a lot of big emotions to process!
I have worked with my unconscious sun, which is in 40.2, to help feel more energized through practicing deep relaxation and spending large amounts of time alone. Gate 40 is the gate of aloneness, with a shadow of exhaustion and a gift of resolve. The line two of the hermit adds to the need for isolation in this gate, which means that I thrive when left alone. Because I work online, I am technically home alone most of the time, but I am still in the energy of other people when working. Creating time boundaries around my availability has made me feel more energized. I now take weekends off, I don’t respond first thing in the morning, and I don’t respond to anyone in the evenings.
Another large shift I made was in my creative process. I was used to generating a large volume of content from a place of pressure. Because the pressure was there, I had the ability to focus my thoughts and create content at lightning speed. As soon as that pressure was no longer there, the inspiration felt like it disappeared as well. I found that without the motivation of needing to get something done by a certain day or time, I had a hard time getting myself to generate at the same capacity I had been.
The actionable change was much smaller than the identity work around this. I had a lot of guilt around creating less content, and it felt like I was letting something go. I had to remind myself that a single post from a space of inspiration is much more valuable than 100 posts that were forced. Now, it is a rule that I create from a space of fullness and inspiration. Sometimes it feels slow and like there are too many half-baked ideas, but giving myself this creative freedom has allowed me to accept the messiness of my creative process.
When I started working from home, I also assumed the role of housewife. At first, I felt like this was an additional burden and just one more thing on my plate that was taking away from me being productive and getting work done. What I have found is that it is actually incredibly grounding and therapeutic. When doing physical work, your mind slows down and you shift your consciousness to a lower level of alertness. Physiologically this means slower brain waves which can decrease stress levels, allow for an almost meditative practice, and puts you in a receptive energy. When I say that anything I do outside of work is a waste of time, I am directly connecting my effort to my income. In order to step into your feminine, those ties need to be broken and money needs to be attached to everything you do. Housework and experimentation with new recipes make me more abundant because it relaxes and satisfies me. It reminds me of the time freedom I have created, and allows me to be grateful that I can take my time with everything I do.
Working with my feminine energy has meant learning to take care of myself and detaching money from only being made through effort. I am spending a lot more time now doing things that support me doing my best work, so that in the limited time I do spend working, I am able to maximize my energy. This has not only allowed me to work primarily in my zone of genius, but has encouraged me to start doing things other than just work and work harder. I am receiving the freedom that I have already created, and I am learning to receive more while doing less.
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